Counseling & Tools for Your Marriage and Family
One-on-one by secure video with Mark Spurlock, LMFT.
Most people who call me about drinking or using are not at rock bottom. You are still going to work and still showing up for your kids, and you keep telling yourself it is not that bad. But something has started to bother you. A spouse said something. A morning went missing. The promise to cut back did not hold past Thursday. You do not need to have it all figured out to start.
Addiction rarely stays in one person’s life. It lands on a marriage and a family too. Your spouse notices the missing mornings first. Your kids notice who shows up. Drinking and using are often the answer to another question: stress, grief, anger, loneliness, or an old wound that never healed. When you are ready, and if you want it, we can bring your spouse into the work.
Most people who come to me are of two minds, and that is normal. In motivational interviewing I ask open questions and help you find your own reasons for change, because when you choose the direction yourself, the change tends to last.
We set goals you choose. Some want to stop completely, some want to cut back. If a goal is not safe for you, I will tell you plainly. We map your triggers so the pattern stops ambushing you. You learn to ride out a craving, which rises, peaks, and passes like a wave. And we build a plan for slips ahead of time, because a slip is information, not a verdict.
| Level | What it looks like | Who it usually fits |
|---|---|---|
| Level 1: Outpatient | Regular sessions with a counselor while you live at home and keep working | People who are still functioning but want to change their drinking or use |
| Level 2: Intensive outpatient | Several hours of treatment a week, often in groups, still living at home | People who need more structure and support than weekly sessions |
| Level 3: Residential | Living at a treatment program for a period of time | People whose home life or use pattern makes recovery at home too hard for now |
| Level 4: Inpatient | Hospital-level care with round-the-clock medical staff | People with serious medical or withdrawal risks |
I came to addiction counseling from the courtroom hallway. Early in my career I ran court-ordered domestic violence recovery groups, and alcohol or drugs were in the room for a large share of the men in those chairs. I served as Assistant Director of a substance abuse program in San Diego, founded and chaired the substance abuse committee of the San Diego Domestic Violence Council, and helped bring the ASAM Criteria into how the county’s courts, probation, and parole matched people to treatment. I have been counseling since 1998. I am a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in California, LMFT 45318.
Book with Mark. Your insurance is checked before the session. We talk about what you use, how often, and what it is costing you. We also talk about what it does for you, because it is doing something, or you would have stopped already. I look at the whole picture, including your health, any withdrawal risk, and the people you go home to, to see whether weekly counseling is the right fit. No judgment.
No. Many people start with the goal of cutting back. I will be honest with you about what is safe.
It is weekly counseling while you live at home and keep up your daily life.
Yes. I see clients by secure video anywhere in California.
Yes, when you are ready. Addiction affects the whole family, and couples counseling can be part of recovery.
Christian Counseling is available. My approach draws on clinical best practices and sound, tested wisdom.
Then we talk about it openly, and I help you find the right next level of care.
The ASAM Criteria describe four levels of addiction care: outpatient, intensive outpatient, residential, and inpatient. Weekly counseling is the first level, and for many people it is the right place to start. If we find together that you need more support, I will help you step up, and when you are steady again, you step back down.
A word on safety. If you drink heavily every day, or regularly use anti-anxiety pills such as Xanax or Valium, or opioids, please talk with a doctor before you stop suddenly. Withdrawal can be medically dangerous.
If you are in crisis or thinking about harming yourself, call or text 988, the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline. In an emergency, call 911.
You do not have to be at rock bottom to deserve help, and you do not have to have every answer before you begin. You only have to be willing to look. I will meet you there with honesty, respect, and a plan.
No insurance? See private pay.
Mark Spurlock, LMFT. California license 45318. Counseling since 1998. Licensed since 2008. If you are in crisis, call or text 988.
